I had the privilege
of selling a home to a Serbian family several years ago. A wonderful man and
wife with a young son who epitomize the essence of immigrating to a better way
of life in America. They migrated here after the terrible war in the 1990's that ripped apart the former country of Yugoslavia. On arrival, they immersed themselves in hard work and
saving their earnings to plan for a better future. They were successful and
well qualified to purchase when I started working with them. It has indeed been
an honor to become acquainted with a family of such integrity and character.
I did not know that he was
the patriarchal leader of a large family group that settled in North Carolina.
Over the past 15 years, he has referred other family members to me from Bosnia,
Croatia and Montenegro. Everyone that I have met has been a credit to their
heritage and a delight to work with. They all share a similar work ethic that would put most Americans to shame. They don't ask for entitlements, they believe in earning what they get. I'd like to think that I have become a
friend of the family and gained their trust. That is certainly true of the
patriarch's nephew who has become my good friend.
During the difficult process
of selecting a home, many things must be explained to folks from different
cultures. Things that seem relatively simple, become quite complex when neither
understands the others language. To be totally honest, they all speak english
fairly well, but I don't speak any of the slavic tongues. I learned key words like "dobre"
(good) and "nia dobre" (not good), but the task of explaining real
estate concepts has required help. That help comes from the children who have
been in the public school system and have had to learn english to get by. Frankly, I
have used the teenage children many times to help explain the more difficult
concepts. Their children are all very bright and all have attended college. One
is now a psychiatrist in Raleigh and others are starting promising careers that
will be a credit to American culture.
But the really neat thing is
that we get to learn their culture as they are learning ours. Serbian culture
is heavily influenced by all the surrounding countries, but especially Greece
and Turkey. Eastern Orthodox Christianity, headed in Constantinople, parted
with the Roman church hundreds of years ago and though it was repressed by the
Soviet Union, it still survives and most of my clients have ties to Eastern
Orthodoxy. Though the country follows the Roman calendar,
the Eastern orthodox church follows the Gregorian calendar.
What a surprise to get a
call from my friend and receive an invitation to join his family for a Christmas
feast in the middle of January. Officially, the Gregorian calendar celebrates
Christmas 15 days after the Roman calendar, but it is traditional for each
family to select a day around the official date to host their own special
Christmas holiday meal. His family picked the day set aside by the church to
celebrate Saint John the Baptist. And what a meal it was; the Greek and Turkish
influences were evident in many dishes. There was smoked tenderloin, smoked
ribs, a delicate chicken noodle soup, delicious beef stew, cabbage rolls
stuffed with ground beef and rice, a light phyllo-like dough wrapped around
cheeses and spinach (sarna), mashed potatoes with onions, a cabbage slaw, ham and
cheese and of course home baked bread that had been blessed by the priest. Did
I forget to mention that the mom had baked four cakes for dessert.
For that matter, she had prepared every dish from scratch, according to
the old traditional ways. There was pride and skill in every bite that was
lovingly prepared for this most special occasion. Family members just pop in
and out during the course of the afternoon and evening, and everyone has a
great time catching up. It was a special day for a family that is holding on to
their cherished traditions, while adapting to their new life in this crazy new
world.
My wife and I felt honored
and sincerely appreciated the invitation. We only stayed for a couple of hours,
but the feasting went on until midnight. I hope that next year we are again
invited to visit with such genuine and warm-hearted folks. It will give us a
chance to catch up with the other family members during our second Christmas,
in January.
John the Baptist and the cathedral of Saint Sava in Belgrade, Serbia
The Theotokos of Vladimir, Icon of the Virgin Mary
The former Yugoslavia is now a group of small republics.
